My So-called Charmed Life


I used to think I had a Charmed Life.  Actually, I’m pretty sure I still do.  I have a good job, a loving husband of 35+ years, and all my children are healthy.  Things seem to go my way – I don’t seem to have trouble getting a job, we have a nice house, and the only medication I need to take is for a sluggish thyroid.   Life is good.

However, lately, I feel like I’m having problems with my so-called charmed life.  I have this kid, see, who doesn’t look at the world through the same rose-colored glasses that I do.  My father-in-law once told me that “you are only as happy as your unhappiest child”.  How prophetic!  Well this particular child of mine isn’t happy.  Things aren’t going her way. So now I am almost as upset as she is, but for an entirely different reason. 

I don’t know how to tell her that “life isn’t fair” and still come out alive.  She is of the opinion that capitalism is a corrupt system, and that all her troubles stem from this.  She thinks that everyone should get the same amount of money, no matter what kind of job they do.  It doesn’t matter to her that some people are lazy and don’t really work at their jobs, or that other people have gone to school or practiced their craft for years, to get where they are, she wants a redistribution of other people’s money

I’m of the opinion that a person “reaps what he sows”, and that you make your own fortune.  When the three little piggies were building their houses, each of them made their own choice, two of them unfortunately, chose poorly.   Having a bad attitude won’t get you ahead, in fact, studies have shown that success does not beget happiness, but rather happiness begets success. Shawn Achor, is a bestselling author of Before Happiness (2013) and The Happiness Advantage (2010).  He has become one of the world’s leading experts on the connection between happiness and success. To quote him, “if you want to be successful, first you have to be happy”.  This applies to success in all areas of our life, from academic & athletic performance, to job or career performance.

So don’t blame me for your troubles, honey.  Look within.  Find your happy.  Perhaps you will have better success in your career aspirations, financial aspirations and general life goals if you do.  Rose colored glasses come cheap.  Go get some.

Musings

I was browsing through Pinterest the other day, looking for tutorials on how to make something when I realized that hey!  I not only know how how to do that, but I actually taught myself that technique years ago. . . .meaning, I figured it out on my own.  Then, I took a step back, looked at my own efforts and then compared them to the one on-line, and I actually fared better than I thought I would.

I think we all have a tendency to compare ourselves to others, usually unfavorably.  Ok, so some people think they are all that, but for the most part, people are looking for validation of their worth, and hoping we measure up to the “competition” (if you will).  Psychologists will tell you this is unhealthy, and to stop doing that!!  Personally I think it is instinctual to compare yourself to others, but unfortunately we usually sell ourselves short.  I see the following on the internet all the time:

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Here is another one:

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This is our (unfortunate) expectation of our efforts.  We look at what we can do, create or whatever, and come up selling ourselves short.  Trick is to see yourself in a more positive light.  Realize that we’re better than we thought we were, and to give ourselves a little credit.